War is Ugly

“For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the powers, against the world forces of this darkness, against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.”

Eph. 6:12

It’s just now dawing on me again that we are at war. I’m not talking about some physical war, although that would be a true statment as well. I’m talking about the spiritual battle we fight every day. Lately is seems that ever area of my life is being bombarded with plots straight from the pit of hell. The good news is we win.

“Upon this rock I will build My church; and the gates of Hell will not overpower it.”

Matt. 16:18 

“I have told you these things, so that in Me you may have peace; in this world you will have trouble. But take heart, I have overcome the world” 

Jn. 17:33

But You Lord are a shield around me, my glory and the One who lifts up my head. I cry aloud to the Lord and He answers me from His Holy mountain”

Ps. 3 3-4

I don’t think I need to explain those verses…

Do You Trust Me?

Most of you who will read this know that something incredibly unbelievable has been happening in my life over about the past two weeks, really, and while it’s exciting it almost has me as worried as it has me excited… So I was thinking, and praying today, and everything that could go wrong in this particular situation… I was asking God, “Why now?” and “Is this really You” and yatta yatta blah blah…. My mind was all over the place, then I heard, almost as clear as I hear this guy blabbing on the phone in the next office, “Daniel, do you trust Me”- That shut me up real quick… I have to trust that God knows what He’s doing in causing all of this to happen at this moment, and that He’ll be faithful to finish what He started… a long long time ago… Just because I know that, doesn’t make it any easier… So my answer to God was “I’m trying, I’m really trying”… and I am…

Sleep is Boring…

Apperently my body has decided we sleep on it’s terms, and it’s terms only… I’ve told it it’s time to go to bed a bunch of times now, but it just won’t listen…

Sometimes We Have to Wait for What We Want

And sometimes we don’t want what we want- Shala Peeples.

Ever find yourself suprised by what you really want? Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about what I want out of life. The conclusion I have come to is that I want to be succseful profossionally, yes, but I would rather be extremely succesful personally. What I mean by that is, yes, it would be great to have lots and lots of money, and have people know what I have done professionally, but to me, it would mean more to know that I’ve raised my (future) kid right, and given my (future) wife a happy life. You know what I mean, I’d rather be rich with being a great man of God and a good father and husband than have a million dollars… I mean, a million dollars would be great too, but… how much greater would it be to know you’ve raised children who will do God’s will with their lives? Don’t get me wrong, I want to persue my career too, and I want to do the best I can at that, but not at the expense of having an amazing family…

 So, I’ve done, or am doing all the things I need to do to be succefull professionally, now I need to work on the personal end… My relationship with God is probably better than it’s ever been, so I guess I’ll just keep at that, and see what happens…

To Be Free…

^“15I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.
¹⁶Now if I do what I do not want, I agree that the law is good.
¹⁷So then it is no longer I that do it, but sin which dwells within me.
¹⁸For I know that nothing good dwells within me, that is, in my flesh. I can will what is right, but I cannot do it.” -Rom. 7:15-18

Why Does the FDA Feel the Need to Protect Me?

Some years back some friends and mine and I all fell in love with these little “Fruity Gel Cups”. We discovered them through a mission trip to Japan, and found that we could actually purchase them here in the U.S.. They were delicious. These little fruit cups where like a “super jello” but better tasting and they had this little wad of “mega super jello” inside of them. Their texture was cool because they had the soft jelly on the outside, and this kind of gummy chewy sort of jello on the inside.

For a long time I bought stock piles of them until I eventually lost interest or became to poor to feed my “jelly cup addiction”, I’m not actually sure which it was. A couple weeks ago though, I suddenly remebered them after reading in a friends blog about her trip to the Asian food store… I thought to myself “man I wish I could remeber what those things were called, they were awesome!”. So living in the day and age that we do, I decided almighty Google was the best place to find out the name of the squishly little delights. It took a while, but after about 50 pages of Japanese gibber-gabber I found them! Imagine me peronal joy! Once I found out the name I searched several Online Asian Markets, looking for these things, and could not find one that carried them. So I tired E-Bay, no luck, I tried Craigs list, not really expecting them to be there, and of course the weren’t. So it was back to the drawing board… After about a whole other half hour of searching I discovered that my tasty little confection has been OUTLAWED in the United States because of a possible choking hazard! I was furious! I still am…

I understand not wanting these to get into the hands of extremely small children, but seriously, kids who are old enough to eat a jaw breaker should be perfectly able to eat these things without dying… And I am a 24 year old man, I can buy alcohol, tobacco, and lottery tickets, all of which are more harmful to my health than Jelly Cups! If I want to put myself at risk of choking by eating the mostly delicious choking hazard availible, I should be able to do just that… Why can’t they just put a warning on the label and LET ME HAVE MY JELLY CUP!!!

Pain Breeds Creativity, if You Let It…

Over the past year God has really been dealing with me on some issues that have been present in my life as long as I can remeber. There are things that are present in my life because of things that happened when I was a child… That is true for almost, everyone, I know. I’ve come to the realazation lately though, that if I want to overcome these things I have to go back to where there started. I have to go back to the hurting 5 year old boy, and I don’t want to go back there. In fact, I don’t even remeber that time in my life, I don’t remeber a good portion of my childhood. I’m sure because it’s painful, and my brain has decided to file it in the “do not open” cabinet. It’s time now though, for me to go back, and to see where these things have their roots. To see who planted them, and why they’ve continued to grow… I’m not saying all the problems I have no are because I had a bad childhood, there were personal descions that lead to a lot of my issues as well…

The problem is I don’t know how to go back. I don’t know how to make myself remeber something my brain thinks I’m not supposed to remeber. I know I have to though… There are a lot of painful things in my past, and I don’t know what’s going to happen to me internally if I go poking around, but I know that I can’t keep living with the fruit these things have born in my life. I’m thinking I need to be “seeing somone” not as in dating, but as in a therapist. There’s a lot of stimga around therapy, but at this point I’m willing to try anything. It’s time to move on, it’s time to conquer this stuff and live like I’m supposed to be living…

A large portion of my overcoming this stuff depends on how much I can rely on God to change me, as well. I’ve been trying to do that, but when you’ve help onto things for the better part of 24 years, it’s hard to know how to let them go. I wish I could just hand them to God, and say “here” but I don’t know how to do that… People always say, “give your problems to God” how in the world am I supposed to do that? I don’t know, but I’m trying to learn… I’m tired of living everyday waiting to be free of this stuff, I’m want to be rid of it all for good. I feel like I’m doing everything I can, even though I must not be, because things are getting any better…

On to the title of this thing… While I hate that all of the terrible things that are in my childhood happened, I think they’ve birthed a lot of my creativity. I am a person who lives in a creative world, and I don’t think I could be that person if I hadn’t dealt with some of the things in my past. I guess some good did come of all that stuff, but I’m ready to take hold of the good things, and let go of the crap…

I’m in a to Hurry To Get Things Done

Oh I rush and rush until life’s no fun, all I really gotta do is live and die, but I’m in a hurry and don’t know why!-Alabama

Why is is that people driving on interstate highways feel the need to cut you off to get in the fast lane then drive ten miles an hour UNDER the speed limit!

“In case you weren’t aware, the speed limit was changed to 70 miles an hour like… TEN YEARS AGO!”- that is to the 90 year old woman in the cadillac that cut me off four times yesterday, and to all the people I encountered this morning wh decided the left lane was the place to put their make-up on, or eat their breakfast.

Driving 100 miles a day to and from work I spend several hours a week on varous highways, and I have come to the conclusion that no one in this state knows how to drive… Yesterday, on my way home, I drove 55 mph for about 30 miles on I-40, that is rediculous. It took me almost twice as long to get home as it normally would. While it is perfectly within the rights of other drivers to drive 55 mph, it is not in their rights to do so in the LEFT lane. I counted three signs on my 30 miles drive yesterday that said “Slower Traffic Keep Right”… If you want to drive 55, fine, but do it in the right lane!

It Knocks Out the Fat…

Oh, if only it were as simple as the Lean-Mean-Grillin’ Machine

Unfortunatlly it’s more like work your butt off and lose half a pound of fat a week.

Since I’ve moved back to Oklahoma I have gained ten pounds, mostly due to the fact that there is more than just a Subway for lunch around here. I joined a gym when I first moved back, the problem is, I never go. It’s here in Oklahoma City, which you’d think would be great because I could just go after work everyday… Well, somehow I lack the motivation… My plan was to work out with Ponder a couple times a week, cause I don’t really know what to do at the gym other than run on the tredmill for half an hour… I don’t know how to do any of those muscle building things.

My biggest motivator in wanting to devolpe a work out plan is so that I can quit smoking without gaining 12,000 pounds, so you’d think I’d be going more often, but I’m not… Boo Me…

Anyway, next week I’m shooting for three time… We’ll see

^^^^^^^I’m coming back to you baby!

In God We Trust

I worry about the state of our nation probably a little more than the average guy my age, but with the recent news on this upcoming election I tend to fear the worst for us. The only Godly man in the bid for the white house was knocked out last night, and that makes me sad. Normally, I would just settle for another conservative candidate, but there doesn’t appear to actually be one. McCain is a good man, he’s been a good senator, but he’s not really a conservative, and I don’t think he can beat Obama. In fact, I’m not entirely sure anyone can. My only hope was, and is, a miracle. Obama is a uniter, with his slippery speaches and carefully thought out language, he is amazing at telling people what they want to hear. He reminds me of the literary charature in Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings, Grima (Wormtongue), and quite frankly, the man scares me. I want to agree with him when he talks of unafication, and progress, but I don’t want the progress that man wants. His seeming inability to make up his mind about where he stands on the issues is bothersome for me too.  I don’t mind saying that his Muslim background is somewhat unsettling to me, mainly because of the fact the he won’t really tell us what religon he is now. I don’t think he is a terrorist, but it is scary to think the leader of one of the most powerful countires in the world might be praying to Allah for guidence, instead of Jesus.

McCain is the best choice we have left, but I fear that his age, and his stance on the war will keep him out of office. So, what is my hope? I guess I’m hoping for God to interviene. I think if Obama was a strong Christian he would be one of the greatest leaders our country has ever seen. Maybe God will touch him personally once he is in office… I guess I should trust God to see the the right leader is appointed to office.